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Peaks and Valleys Psychology 

Specialized in male abuse, sexual abuse, PTSD 

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Dr. Palfy currently operates her private practice where she works with male survivors of sexual abuse, first responders, victims of bullying, and couples.

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My ApproachNon-judgmental, empathetic and caring approach

I take a non-judgmental, empathetic and caring approach to therapy. I will create a safe space and ensure that you feel comfortable and ready before we begin. I will work collaboratively with you to establish your treatment goals and to determine both the direction and speed of therapy. As we work together I will help you to organize your thoughts and gain awareness and insights into the different aspects, origins and implications of your experience. At the end of each session I will seek your feedback to ensure that we are meeting your therapy goals and allow time to make sure that you are emotionally composed prior to leaving.

Although I use an integrative approach to therapy, I am trained in a number of different therapeutic modalities and I can offer you a wide range of ways to approach your issues. I have completed training in Emotion-Focused Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Prolonged Exposure. This allows me to tailor my sessions to suit your individual needs and comfort level. 

 

 

 

Free and confidential initial 15 minute phone consultation

I offer a free and confidential initial 15 minute phone consultation to help you determine whether you feel comfortable working with me, and to determine whether I am well suited to help you with the issue(s) you are struggling with.
 

 Individual Counselling:

I offer counselling and EMDR to individuals 15 and older. Parental consent is required if you are under the age of 18, unless you are deemed to be a mature minor and are in charge of your own care. In rare circumstances I offer phone sessions, but only after several in-person sessions have occurred.
 

 Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse

For my doctoral research I examined why males so seldom report sexual abuse. If you are a male survivor consider coming to see me, and consider reading my book. There are a lot of other resources recommended within my book that you may also find helpful. Healing is possible.
 

 Couples Counselling:

I utilize an Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy Approach as well at the Gottman Method.
 

 Group Therapy:

I am currently not offering group therapy, but have experience running group in the following areas:

  • Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse (8 sessions)
  • Sleep Hygiene/Nightmare Prevention  

 

 

Areas of Practice


I was introduced to male victimology while working in the ICE Unit (Integrated Child Exploitation Unit) of the Behavioral Sciences Unit  of the RCMP in BC.  At a private training seminar in Ottawa former NHL player, Sheldon Kennedy, discussed the sexual abuse he suffered under Coach Graham James. Although this was already public information I was shocked to learn how prevalent male sexual abuse is, particularly in organized sports and especially among junior male athletes. Of equal concern was the obvious lack of reporting. As a former police lady, now as a psychologist, I have spent several years studying abuse and attempting to recognize and understand the grooming process as well as the reasons why victims often do not discuss their abuse until years later.

In 2004 I researched and organized the data/exhibits associated with the RCMP’s first sex tourism investigation.  For 3 years I managed thousands of exhibits and thematically organized/analyzed the electronic data associated with this complex investigation involving 97 victims and 39 crime scenes. This gave me intimate exposure to observe the psychological processes associated with grooming, victimology and sexual abuse.

In 2010/11 while completing my MA, I worked at the BC Society for Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse. I counselled men struggling with issues associated to childhood and adult sexual abuse in both individual and group settings.

In 2011 my unique professional experiences and intimate exposure to this topic compelled me to conduct research examining why men so seldom report sexual assaults. I have now competed my research. I have come to understand many of the reasons why males do not report abuse and how society has failed to meet their needs. I  have also learned to see that male abuse is far more prevalent than I had previously been aware of...

Working with male survivors and their partners has been the highlight of my career to date and is a primary area of interest for me. I have attended the bi-annual Healing and Hope for Male Survivors International Conference in New York 3 times. I have also attended training at The Men’s Project in Ottawa and at the BC Society for Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse.

As a medically retired Mountie (Reg #45004) I have 13 years of experience working in the field. I understand the challenges, rewards, high expectations, disappointments and tragedies that you face on a daily basis. I investigated crimes in the undercover capacity and in the municipal drug, child sexual exploitation, gang and homicide units. I am comfortable working with police and military as well as those attempting to make change.

I experienced PTSD due to  years of bullying and harassment in the workplace. I have recovered from this debilitating disorder and I am confident your symptoms can be reduced too. I will do my best to help you on your journey to recovery.

I have several methods to treat PTSD depending on the nature, severity and symptoms you currently experience. I am formally trained in Prolonged Exposure, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing and Cognitive Behavior Therapy. I will work to help you diminish your recurring physiological symptoms, change your dysfunctional thought patterns and help you feel better about yourself.

As children your parents are responsible to protect you, teach you to soothe yourself and nurture your mental/emotional, physical and spiritual growth. When this doesn’t happen it can diminish your sense of self-worth and leave you feeling lost, hopeless and even lacking in identity.

Perhaps you grew up in a loving home but did not feel like you could discuss abuse that you experienced outside the home with your parents. Many children do not discuss abuse with those they love to protect them from the truth, when they feel their parents could not handle the truth, and when they believe that exposing it may break up their family, etc.

I have several ways to approach processing memories of abuse, depending on your comfort level and your ability and desire to explore these deep issues. See my section on EMDR for one way I can assist you to cope, process and get past troubling memories of abuse.

While some stress and anxiety can be helpful, many people experience debilitating worry about future events or find themselves ruminating about past events. Perhaps you lie awake at night and/or wake up early due to nightmares? You may also wake early and worry about your day ahead or have trouble falling asleep because of something that happened in the past? If so, I can provide you with ways to manage your nightmares and anxiety when they arise. I can also help you to develop healthy sleep promoting habits.

As we explore the complex thought processes, emotions and behaviors that sometimes keep you stuck, I will assist you to learn emotional regulation skills, provide you with insight about common problematic ways of thinking and share with you the common mistakes people often make when attempting to manage strong emotions. Outside of this, I can provide clients with tools to help them make important decisions, and strategies to help prevent people from contineally re-experiencing debilitating anxiety in the future.

In my former capacity as a police lady I witnessed and experienced  bullying and harassment in the work place.  At the time I felt powerless to stop it since my abusers were also my superiors. If you are in a similar situation at work I can assist you in finding ways to set healthy boundaries and support you to make major life decisions. As someone who is well-informed about the potential consequences of whistle-blowing, taking action and not taking action, I can also help you to weigh out your options. If you are a whistle-blower I can help you to make sense of how you got to where you are and to make plans of where to go from here. 

Although scientists do not know for sure how EMDR works, it appears that the bi-lateral brain stimulation techniques used in EMDR have a specific effect on memory retrieval, encoding and storage.  Specifically, the eye movements, tapping, etc. appear to stimulate the brain to process information in a way that is similar to that which occurs during REM sleep. This brain stimulation appears to facilitate and enhance information processing which allows negative experiences to be discharged from our nervous systems and our belief systems. EMDR is a structured 8 phase approach to psychotherapy that addresses past, present, and future aspects of any traumatic or distressing issues or memories.  EMDR uses specific procedures to access existing information, introduce new information, facilitate processing and unblock areas of the brain that inhibit accessing and processing of stored memories. It incorporates elements of psychological, cognitive, psychodynamic, adaptive information processing, somatic, and humanistic approaches to therapy.

 

Why Choose EMDR?

In a broad sense EMDR is intended to alleviate suffering.   Early and disturbing experiences, unmet interpersonal needs and traumas can have negative and long-lasting effects. Information, including negative beliefs about yourself  that you develop early in life, can get locked in or trapped in your memory systems and can affect the way you see yourself and the world around you. EMDR helps your brain to process unresolved experiences/issues by making the appropriate cognitive and emotional connections while the information is being accessed. EMDR has the ability to facilitate profound therapeutic change in much less time than other traditional therapies and without the need to discuss issues in intimate detail.

 

What EMDR Can and Cannot Do...

EMDR can help your body to adaptively process somatic (bodily) distress and release the physiological pain that gets trapped within your nervous systems after a trauma occurs.   It will not make you forget painful memories; however it can reduce the vividness and emotional intensity of those memories making you more able to tolerate them. EMDR may help immediately or it can take up to several (8-10) sessions before isses are resolved in this fashion.  Many issues are complex and require attention to many specific details before they can be resolved. 

 

What to Expect During the Process of EMDR...

During the processing phases of EMDR you will be asked to focus on the disturbing memory or issue.  I will do either multiple brief ‘sets’ of eye movement or alternate hand-tapping.  Following each set I will ask you what new information arose during the process. You do not have to share the details of your thoughts with me if you don’t want to. However, we will use this new material as the focus of our next set.  During this activation phase you may re-experience aspects of the original event, which may retain high levels of sensory and emotional intensity, even though many years may have passed. I will ask you to observe them from a distance.

EMDR works directly with your memory networks and enhances your information processing by forging new associations between the distressing memory and your more current adaptive information contained within your current memory networks. It is thought that distressing memories are transformed when new connections are forged with more positive and realistic information. This results in the transformation of the emotional, sensory, and cognitive components of the memory; when the new memory is accessed the individual is less distressed. Instead he/she recalls the incident with a new perspective, possibly even new insight, and with the resolution of cognitive distortions, elimination of emotional distress, and relief from the previous physiological arousal.

Sometimes life’s circumstances can get you down. I help clients find hope, provide strategies to overcome sadness, and support clients to increase their sense of joy and fulfillment in life. My goal in therapy is always to assist you to live a happier more satisfying life.

As a Christian I am very comfortable bringing faith in to our sessions. Some of my favorite scriptures are as follows:

Isaiah 26:3-4 "You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You." NKJV

Hebrews 10:23 "Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful".

Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your path." NKJV

Phillippians 1:6 "Be confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." NKJV

My favorite being:Proverbs 3:11 "My son do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor detest his correction; For whom the Lord loves, he corrects" NKJV.

Although I am Christian I am comfortable providing services to people not prescribing to the Christian faith.

There are times when couples may need the help of a trained professional to work through the problems that arise within their marriage. Issues I help with include infidelity, life transitions, role changes, or simply learning how to fight fair and fight less. Together we will take a collaborative approach to rebuilding trust and to develop healthy patterns of communication in your relationship. 

Whether you have lost a spouse, family member, friend, or your identity due to life transitions, illness, suicide or homicide, I am comfortable supporting you on your grief journey. I will create a safe space for you to explore and experience your thoughts and emotions.

In 2014 I designed and implemented a 5 session sleep hygiene class for cancer patients at the Cross Cancer Institute. All of the participants who were experiencing a lack of sleep reported either an improvement in the sleep time or quality as a result of attending this class. Many  became able to sleep without the use of sleep aids. Attend a group or discuss your sleep issues with me individually during session. 


 

Contact: 780-242-4055

kellipalfypsychology@gmail.com

I follow the recommended fee schedule for psychologists in Alberta which is $200 per each 50 minute session (individual or couple). Many insurance policies, including Blue Cross, SunLife or other employee health benefit programs cover the cost (or a portion of the cost) of private psychological services. At the end of each session clients are issued a receipt which they may submit for reimbursement by their employee benefits or insurance company.

Payment is accepted through VISA, MasterCard, cheque or cash. 

There is no charge for cancellations made 24 hours or more in advance. Sessions cancelled with less than 24 hours’ notice will be billed at 50% of the recommended full session rate.I currently direct bill to Blue Cross and Medivue/Veterans Affairs

 

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Contact Dr. Kelli Palfy

 780-242-4055

 kellipalfypsychology@gmail.com

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